Updates on the Style's life journey~!

[JustMyron]

Hey Style! Good to see you again. 

[styleislove]

I missed you guys too! It's only been forever and a half.

kevin.Yes I have. Gone away to many odd places indeed.

Leese, . Cause goddamn. I've missed you!

Tris!!!!! My personal by-my-side fangirl~ :3 I f**king want a Prussia car.

JM. HUGS. Give me them!

[TrisTennant]

Prussia cars are awesome.

[styleislove]

Prussia cars are what I now live for.

[Ratman]

orly? Prussian cars are that good?  Don't tell Davdi, he no like Prussians. 

[styleislove]

Not 'prussian' but Prussia! Character from an anime. Because I am a total nerd.

[styleislove]

Rawr. >:3

Well, Style has some new things to say.

I've been living with Sarah now for a couple months, and it's nice. Except that bit in the beginning. Where she went behind my back and dated my ex. And is still dating him. >.> Strangle. Urge to strangle.
Sarah's sister is the most annoying, b***hiest woman on the planet. She's so f**king loud! I wish she would just shut up.
Sarah's parents are pleasant. Her mom is probably my favorite person right now.

My friend Rachael and I are trying to hang out more, especially since we'll both be leaving soon. We both are getting into JobCorps, because we're both missed more credits than ever imaginable, and can't graduate. >.> We're going to different locations and won't be able to see each other but we'll survive.

Justin has been an incredible help to my mental state. He can be annoying but mostly he's a sweetheart and makes me feel better.  He's really the best I could ever hope for, I hope we'll get to be friends forever.

I met this girl, that I really like. She's so...tiny. And cute. And she adores me for some unknown reason. However she lives on the other side of the planet practically and so...no chance. Dx Dangit.

Wicca has become a very big part of me getting past all this crap. xD It's nice to just sit and meditate with a candle...

And lastly, Minecraft. The only thing keeping me from sleeping all day and giving into depression. I cannot wait for the Adventure Update. :3

[kevin]

Wicca has become a very big part of me getting past all this crap. xD It's nice to just sit and meditate with a candle...

how do you find wicca helpful?

[styleislove]

The general feeling doing a ritual gives me. It's like a shot of energy directly where I need it most. It's nice. I wish I had my own room though. It's very hard to get private time to do things at 1 am.

[kevin]

is there something specific about the wiccan approach, though? or is it the discipline of the meditation that's important?

[styleislove]

Not really. Right now I'm just focusing on the simple idea of meditation, nothing hardcore. :P

[kevin]

what do you do?

[styleislove]

Sit on the ground with a lit candle and empty my mind, just focus on keeping myself relaxed and at peace. Once I'm relaxed I just let my mind wander. It helps me think about things.

[kevin]

ever tried listening?

[rickymooston]

Sit on the ground with a lit candle and empty my mind, just focus on keeping myself relaxed and at peace. Once I'm relaxed I just let my mind wander. It helps me think about things.

Sounds cool. If you replace the candle with your finger or a wall, that's what I do.

[styleislove]

ever tried listening?

Listening to what?

It is quite nice...now I even have some nice music to listen to as well. It's getting harder to do it by the day though...sharing a room is hell.

[rickymooston]

Listening to what?

I think he was trying to describe a mental state/technique using Quaker terminology^TM. Several meditation techniques appear to use "listening"; e.g., "listen to heartbeat, listen to the wind, listen to the crickets, to your measured breathing ...".

[kevin]

meditation typically involves the cessation of listening, and the attempt to blank one's preoccupation with self.

and there are discipline practices like ricky talks about, that help to quiet yourself internally.

Once I'm relaxed I just let my mind wander. It helps me think about things.

i'm asking whether you've tried turning off the tape loop and just listened. not blanking your consciousness, and not concentrating on an external stimulus, and trying not to let your mind wander. it's not easy to do.

just listening, inside your head, but while you are still right there. not someplace else, inside or outside.

[rickymooston]

Style when you medidate, do you use a tape? You mentioned a candle and kevin seems to have assumed the existence of some kind of a tape.

(I use neither but would prefer the candle to the tape most of the time.)

[kevin]

by "tape loop," i'm talking about the constant self-absorbed chatter that goes on in everybody's head during 99 percent of a waking day.

when you "let your mind wander," you're listening to your own mind.

i'm suggesting NOT listening to your own mind.

[styleislove]

Ahh, yeah. I understand, I'm definitely wanting to be able to meditate without that "tape" of nonsense that goes through my mind...I would like to attempt that. Maybe I'll try tonight.

[rickymooston]

Ahh, yeah. I understand, I'm definitely wanting to be able to meditate without that "tape" of nonsense that goes through my mind...I would like to attempt that. Maybe I'll try tonight.

And ...? Curious to hear.

[Ratman]

I have meditated before and the main thing is is that I felt I was going a bit numb for some reason.

[styleislove]

Haven't really got a chance to do anything. Life has been busy the last few days. Between Job Corps, Minecraft, emotional ordeals and people coming over, I haven't got much time for anything...

[rickymooston]

Haven't really got a chance to do anything. Life has been busy the last few days. Between Job Corps, Minecraft, emotional ordeals and people coming over, I haven't got much time for anything...

My form of meditation takes no effort. Between all of the busy above, just stare at the wall and say Ummm lol.

What is job corps?

[styleislove]

Job Corps is a government program to help people who can't graduate get job training and finish high school.

haha, I would do that but someone would shake me and tell me to stop spacing out. xD

[rickymooston]

Job Corps is a government program to help people who can't graduate get job training and finish high school.

That's cool. 

What is the weakness that made it difficult for you to graduate?

What areas are your strengths?

have you ever had a job? Which areas? What training? 

haha, I would do that but someone would shake me and tell me to stop spacing out. xD

True. Trick is to do it when nobody else is around.

[styleislove]

Ahh, well I don't have any credits from 9th and 10th grade, and I only got 4ish in 11th. I failed too many classes...so I don't have enough credits to even think of graduating any time within the next couple years.

I'm not very good at any school related subjects. Well, I'm good at math I suppose. I passed every math class I've taken. I got a 105% in 10th...but the credits got lost when I moved. :/

I've never had a job, I've done a bit of accounting years ago and actually liked it, but I don't remember anything about it.

There is ALWAYS someone around nowadays. >.> It's annoying.

[rickymooston]

Any idea why? Do you have a learning
disability?

Does this program help people with any disabilites that they might have

Are u disinterested?

You apparently read a lot

[styleislove]

I don't, I'm pretty much a normal kid that just moved around too much to be able to do anything. The program does help people with disabilities especially..Haha, I do read a lot, I love to read...I actually like school a lot.